Screeching Weasel - Jeannie's Got A Problem With Her Uterus lyric

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Jeannie's having problems with her ovaries
She's got trouble with her tubes
If you go past her vagina and her cervix
You will find a completely empty room
Because Jeannie's got a problem with her uterus
Her uterus is useless
Her physician has injected fluids in her private parts
But she just won't believe
That the efforts to eradicate her female trouble
Will cause her to conceive

No simple yeast or bladder infection
Could compare to the pain that Jeannie's going through
This year her husband's sperm was studied
And swiftly passed the test
Now Jeannie's operation must commence
Artificial insemination can't fertilize poor Jeannie's rotten eggs
Jeannie isn't ovulating
Even though she took all the proper pills
Jeannie wants a baby but she cannot pay the giant doctor bills

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